Harry Styles: (n) [heh-ree sti-yul-z]
From Holmes Chapel. Used to work in a bakery, now in a pop sensation boy band, One Direction. Sexy as crap. Curly brown hair, dimples, green/hazel eyes, body of a god, four nipples.
I heard Harry Styles’ hair is insured for $10,000.
Zayn Malik: (n) [zay-n mah-lek]
From Bradford. He’s a bad boiiii. Member of the band One Direction. Mysterious and hot. Black hair, tan, big brown beautiful eyes, letterman jackets. Can often be found looking at himself in a mirror.
I hear Zayn Malik does car commercials… IN JAPAN.
Niall Horan: (n) [niy-yull whore-ran]
From Mullingar. He’s super Irish. Member of the band One Direction. Cheeky little attractive leprechaun. Rosy cheeks, bleach blonde hair, braces, blue eyes, tight polos and cardigans, chinos, snapbacks.
One time, Niall Horan met Justin Bieber at the KCA’s, and he told him he was pretty!
Louis Tomlinson: (n) [lew-ee tawm-len-sin]
From Doncaster. The swag master. Member of the band One Direction. Ass better than Beyonce’s. Blue eyes, tan skin, brown sex hair, striped shirt, red tight pants. Is usually in Harry’s pants.
Louis Tomlinson is flawless.
Liam Payne: (n) [lee-yum pay-n]
From Wolverhampton. Daddy direction. Member of One Direction. Brown hair, tall, slammin’ body, Looks like an angel puppy, starts pretty much every 1D song.
One time, Liam Payne punched me in the face… It was awesome.
Carrot Fan: (n) [ker-et f-an]
Someone who prides themselves in their knowledge of 1D related things… They think they’re kewl cause they have seen all the videos of them and memorized their interviews and know the times each boy was born and want to rub in your face how much bigger of a fan they are than you. Every fan has gone through a stage of being a carrot. Most grow out of it. Some do not. Bless their souls.
Fetus: (n) [fee-tuhs]
If your age isn’t on the clock, you’re too young for 1D’s cock. If you are a fan younger than 16, you will be called a fetus. If you are just immature, you will probably be called a fetus. A fetus is a baby before it’s born.
The Directioner Times 